succeed

I can’t blame god for my failures because I don’t believe in Him, so I have found other noble substitutes for Him. These substitutes only make my failures more easily explainable. I tell someone ‘luck’ and he wishes me ‘next time’. Failure becomes so faceable with these substitutes. Without these substitutes, I don’t know how I could have explained people about how my age desires for instant gratification and life desires to live upto the expected and that I am my age and my life is the expected of me.

Why do I crave for success, why do i try to find a substitute to make an excuse, why don’t I completely allow myself to play my age, why do I have to play some of the future ‘me’ now in the present? Why is it so much required to try to be the expected and live a failed?